RHOBH recap, Season 3, Episode 3

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Don’t Sing for your Supper

ISSUES: Hate how we’re teased throughout that LVP and Adrienne will meet up to discuss Adrienne re-telling a false fact that LVP sold gossip stories. Right to the end of the ep. Yet it’s held over to the next ep and not shown! FALSE ADVERTISING!

SCENE: Kim’s daughter’s prom

Kim seems to be making the saddest chicken salad ever, constantly crying with happiness as she soaks up her daughter’s prom day (the third and last of her kids’ proms). Kim didn’t have a prom, as she was a child star hanging out with teen throbs, like Leif Garrett, at Child Star School, where she says her prom was as exciting as saying “Pass the salt.” Noone touches the salad or sodas. She cries as she peeks out the window as her daughter leaves.

SCENE: Yolanda’s party

Yolanda and her butler meet up to discuss a dinner party where she invites the likes of Barbra Streisand, Baby Face etc. This time, the RHOBH are the guests. The house, 12,000 sq ft, designed by Y, is amazing, by the ocean. Menu: coconut shrimp, tempura avocado rolls, goat’s cheese in puff pastry, filet mignon, chicken in mustard sauce with portobello mushrooms. Y says she hopes the housewives’ hearts are “filled with love” (which all the housewives claim), but we’re guessing it’s going to go horribly wrong, as all RHOBH dinner parties do.

SCENE: (skipped a few boring scenes) Adrienne and Dr Paul: why they hate LVP

Dr Paul and Adrienne are hating on LVP’s comments about Adrienne’s shoe line (calling it Malouf’s Hoof) and dog (Crackpot/Jackpot). They want apology! But compared to what Adrienne said about LVP, hell’ll freeze over first.

SCENE: Yolanda’s dinner party

Y says she has extreme OCD — her home and fridge are all perfect with fruit and veg colour-co-ordinated! Nobody wants to touch anything. The food has prof chefs and looks like it’s from a restaurant. No macaroni and cheese here! No, it’s Prawn tempura with roasted quails egg and scallops.Salad: watermelon with buffalo mozzarella, mango coulis and balsamic glaze and shaved parmesan on top.

A world-famuz trumpeter says he can’t get botox around his lip area or he can’t do his magic.

Y’s husband grammy-winner David says he hates frou frou and that not enough women know how to be homemakers today (probs cos they’re out working to pay mortgages).

He plays his fave song he’s ever written, Look What You’ve Done to Me, from Urban Cowboy.

Tay gets tipsy and Y hates how she’s messing up her perfect party by dredging up tacky stuff about Brandi being a slut again, and cries when David plays sad (probs non-copyrighted) old tunes: Amazing Grace and Danny Boy, with amazing singers. Tay is obvs still recovering after her violent hubby did himself in last season, leaving her and her young daughter alone and in a precarious $$$ situation – she should have had time off from RHOBH but maybe needed the income.

Bravo should do a breath/drug test before letting anyone on set, as it’d be better to see honest, non-booze addled interactions.

Best quote: David: “I hate frou frou, I hate frou frou, I hate frou frou.” Whatever that is.

Worst bit: No showdown btw Adrienne and LVP.

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