Lance Leopard — biography

Lance, left, with Pencil Vania. Photo: unknown. From Stewart Graham Collection.

Lance Leopard (11 March 1967 – 16 June 2025) was a writer, club event promoter, performer and make-up artist. He wrote weekly columns in the 1990s about gay and lesbian culture and nightlife on Oxford Street’s “Golden Mile”1 Sydney, adding glitter and sparkle to our lives during the sadness of the peak AIDS era.

He mostly worked for free LGBTIQA+ street newspapers Capital Q and the Sydney Star Observer, glossy “paid for” gay magazines Outrage and Campaign, and music newspaper On The Street. All up, it was around 700 articles and 430,000 to 450,000 words over those seven years.

Lance was also a make-up artist for prominent Sydney and interstate drag queens, event promoter and emceed many community fundraisers, including Mardi Gras events and for HIV/AIDS awareness.

He performed in New Wave band The MegaMen and had small roles in television and short films.

Early career

1981: Developing his fashion style and looks at nightclubs

In 1981 when Lance was 14 he went to The Terminus and Marilyn’s nightclubs in Brisbane, which attracted gay crowds, outsiders and young fashionistas who took pride in wearing the latest hairstyles and creating their own look.2

In person, he had “the dramatic sense of Elizabeth Taylor, the social skills of Princess Lee Radziwill“, “the voice of Rex Harrison” and “the substance capacity of Liza Minnelli“.3 “He was Quentin Crisp, Tennessee Williams, and Joan Collins, à la Alexis, rolled into one.”4

Photo: John Hawker

He loved the traditional gay passions, “high and low”, of popular culture icons, acerbic writers, Hollywood movie stars in old black and white movies, and taught his friends to learn the names of all “Zsa Zsa’s nine husbands”.5

Lance was mentioned in the Queensland Museum’s “Make a Scene: Fashioning Queer Identity and Club Culture in the ’90s” exhibition as a “bon vivant” and make-up artist for both the Glamourpussy fashion label and Kylie Minogue impersonator Adrian Barker. They wore the label’s outfits, which added a sense of “camp energy and theatricality” to their nightclub appearances.6

At 15, Lance left school, as he felt he didn’t need further education to “be a star”.7

1982: Joined the MegaMen

In 1982 Lance played electronic drums when he joined New Wave band The

MegaMen in Brisbane, with Mark Love on synthesiser and Zhian (Clyde Behm) as lead singer. They were the resident band at Marilyn’s nightclub.8 Their 1983 single, Designed for Living, was a “cult-classic hit”,9 which they performed on television for the Brisbane Telethon fundraiser10 and they supported national acts The Reels and Deckchairs Overboard.11

“That band, The MegaMen, made me an overnight star,” Lance wrote. “Limousines were as natural to me as the air that I breathed by the time I was 17. But I was a has-been by the age of 18.”12

Lance performed at two MegaMen reunions: in October 2012 at St Paul’s Tavern, Brisbane, and in 2014 at the Brisbane Powerhouse13 for record label Transmission Communications’ book launch of BNE – The Definitive Archive: Brisbane Independent Electronic Music Production 1979–2014.14 The Designed for Living single was selected for an American compilation of gay electronica in 2024.15

1984–early 1990s: Adopted new name, moved to Sydney, eventually into Nevada Studios (famous for its parties)

Sydney Star Observer 1996.
Photo: Jeff Ward

In 1984, he adopted the Lance Leopard name from a character in one of his favourite books, Patrick Dennis’ parody novel Little Me, a camp send-up of celebrity culture.16

Lance moved to Sydney in 198517 and dabbled in “art, singing, drugs, booze. Mostly socialising”.18 He worked as a make-up artist and stylist19 and ended up in an artists’ collective, Nevada Studios, in 1992, with talented costume creator Brenton Heath-Kerr (who died of AIDS-related complications at the age of 33 on 1 July 1995).20

Nevada Studios was renowned for its parties, such as New Year’s Eve 1993 Poseidon Adventure, where drag queen Bernina Bod (Brett Chamberlain) sang Diana Ross’ Upside Down with tables, chairs and a Christmas tree attached to the ceiling.21

Lance performed as crooning singer “Lance Vegas” at Nevada’s Studio 50Whore party.22 Artist-activist David McDiarmid (1952–1995), who enjoyed fabulous parties in New York from 1979 to 1987, described: “Nevada New Year’s Eve was wild … ”23

In 1993, Lance exhibited ten portraits of drag queens Cindy Pastel, Lady Bump, Maude Boate,24 pop singer Marcia Hines and other inner city performers, in a joint art exhibition All Style No Substance with artist Darian Zam at Nevada Studios, from 15 to 27 December.25

Writing: 1993 to 2000

5 April 1996 Capital Q.
Photo: unknown

Lance began as a television and video reviewer for the Capital Q weekly free newspaper in April 1993, and added a social column in 19 August 1994.26 He was poached by the Sydney Star Observer, where he wrote from 30 May 1996 to 18 September 1997, finishing his last column with half a sentence. The next day, his column in Capital Q started with the rest of the same sentence. His last column appeared on 17 November 200027 when Capital Q closed.28

He wrote weekly Showgirls columns in Capital Q from 19 September 199729 to 3 November 2000, which promoted coming shows and behind-the-scenes gossip. Drag queens and performers regularly mentioned included Claire de Lune, Verushka Darling, Miss 3D, Christie McNicholl, Polly Petrie, Carlotta, Chelsea Bun, Maude Boate, Portia Turbo, Mogadonna, Penny Clifford, Vanessa Wagner, Ricca Paris, Mitzi Macintosh, Lana Turnip, Adele Rio, Pencil Vania, Chris De Bonnafin, Ashley Swift, Tess Tickle, Wyness Mongrel-Bitch, Tony 2000, Victoria Barracks, Victoria Bitter, Cindy Pastel, Stryker Meyer, Connie Cartier, Lady Bump, Verry Tall, Robyn Lee, Penny Tration, Maxi Shield, Doreen Manganini, Vanity Faire, Hillary, Patsy de Klyne, Candy Box, Atlanta Georgia, the Black Eena, Rusty Boxxx, Maxine Du Barry, Betty Windsor, Carmen, Simone Troy and Monique Kelly.

Technologically-challenged, Lance never learnt how to type, and on Mondays used to dictate his Thursday deadline columns in a “fragile and dramatic” state with an “incredibly sore head” after a hectic weekly socialising period which ran from Thursdays to Sundays.30

His stream-of-consciousness writing style was described as “a barely-controlled gush in which sentimentality battles it out with sensationalism, both defying any inclination to scepticism”.31

Rival newspaper Sydney Star Observer gave Lance its 1996 Media Matters Award for “The Queerest Columnist on Earth” for his take on “fashion, haircuts, cocktails, nightclubs, celebrities, dead icons and personal economics”.32

Outrage, Sept 1996.
Photo: Darren Tieste

Lance’s writing covered the schedule of LGBTIQA+ annual events, such as Pride New Year’s Eve parties, Mardi Gras Fair Day, the Mardi Gras parade and party, Shop Yourself Stupid, Hand in Hand Pride party, Bobby Goldsmith Foundation‘s (BGF) Bake-Off, Anti-Violence Project and Ward 17 South fundraisers, DIVA Awards, Sleaze Ball, the Green Park Hotel’s Affair (raising money for Darlinghurst Community Health Centre and St Vincent’s HIV unit) and World AIDS Day.

Some of his talked-about columns included his annual 25 Most Beautiful People roundup,33 Fair Day dunking,34 Mirror Ball collapse on Pride New Year’s Eve partygoers35 and many after-party summaries over several pages.36 His self-confessed vices included stealing friends’ items,37 alcohol,38 turning up late39 and being lazy.40

On his death he was described by a former Sydney Star Observer editor as “the columnist every editor dreams of”, the “love child of Oscar Wilde and Noel Coward”.41 Lance was remembered in a queer anthology as “smart, kind, loving and loyal”42 with a “refreshing disregard for social norms and expectations”.43

Club night promotions

11 August 1995 Capital Q
Photo: unknown

He was a club promoter for Sydney’s Viper Room, a lounge bar at the Beresford hotel (1995-1996),44 The Blue Dragon at MTT (Rogues nightclub),45 and Love Machine at the Bright’N Up Bar, Brighton Hotel.46

He held occasional movie nights with Capital Q‘s astrologer, Stephen Devine,47 at the Hollywood Hotel, the Burdekin and Enmore Cinema, featuring his favourite icons Lana Turner, Elizabeth Taylor, Marlene Dietrich and Joan Crawford, with DJs, quizzes, prizes and tarot readings.48 He could recite the movie lines of leading female actors from the 1930s onwards, and “trashy” 1990s TV series such as Melrose Place and Models Inc.

Lance MCed many community events and fundraisers, including the Mardi Gras costume pageant,49 Fair Day,50 DIVA Awards (also a judge in 1995),51 and for the Bobby Goldsmith Foundation (BGF),52 People Living with HIV/AIDS (PLWHA),53 the Green Hotel’s Affair,54 Shop Yourself Stupid,55 Luncheon Club,56 the AIDS Council of NSW’s (ACON) Hand In Hand party,57 2010,58 AIDS Trust’s Red Ribbon Working Bee59 and ACON’s Anti-Violence Project.60

Bashing in 2001

Lance had multiple surgeries after a vicious gay hate attack on Saturday 3 August 2001 when he was “ambushed and beaten senseless”. He had a metal plate inserted in his jaw, which was “broken on both sides” and “wired shut for six weeks”.61

He needed ongoing surgeries for several months and apologised for being unable to attend and write up the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras events the following year in February 2002.62

Acting roles: 1988 to 2014

Supplied by Violet Black (via LL Facebook).
Photo: unknown

Lance featured as an androgynous muse in the Lime Spiders’ Weirdo Libido music video (1988), the first music video shown by the Australian national broadcaster, the ABC, on its music clip program, rage, on April 17, 1987.63

He made an appearance in the SBS Pizza 8-part comedy series in April 2000 as a “sleazy S&M master”.64

Lance also starred in seven Eterna Films short movie productions, which sponsors the annual ShortFest film festival, that began in 2024.65 Named in his honour, the Lance Leopard award was presented in 2024 and 2025 to short films that recognised the spirit of coming up with an idea that “dares to be different with boldness and audacity”.66

Final years

Lance returned to Brisbane in the 2020s to care for his elderly mother, Carmel. They both had mobility problems and died in a house fire on 16 June 2024, Woodridge, Brisbane.67

  • Written and researched by Cotton Ward. Please acknowledge name and website link, if using. thanks
  • Please let me know re: Photo captions so I can add Credit.

External links

References

  1. Wotherspoon, Garry (2016). Gay Sydney: A History. University of New South Wales: NewSouth Publishing. p. 197. ISBN 9781742234830. ↩︎
  2. Dennis, Patrick (2025). “A Star Is Born”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso. p. 73. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  3. Devine, Stephen (12 March 1999). “Devine Intervention”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  4. Kelly, David Owen (2025). “Rutland Court”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso. p. 70. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  5. Kelly, David Owen (2025). “Rutland Court”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso. p. 67. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  6. Salter, Chris (2025). Make a Scene: Fashioning Queer Identity and Club Culture in the 90s. Brisbane: Queensland Museum. Archived from the original on 7 January 2026. Retrieved 7 January 2026. ↩︎
  7. Kelly, David Owen (2025). “Rutland Court”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso. p. 67. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  8. Dennis, Patrick (2025). “A Star is Born”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso Books. p. 75. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  9. Dennis, Patrick (2025). “A Star is Born”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso Books. p. 75. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  10. Potts, Andrew. “Lance Leopard remembered”. QNews. Brisbane. Archived from the original on 7 January 2026. Retrieved 7 January 2026. ↩︎
  11. Potts, Andrew. “Lance Leopard remembered”. QNews. Brisbane. Archived from the original on 7 January 2026. Retrieved 7 January 2026. ↩︎
  12. Leopard, Lance (15 September 2000). “$1.5 million of Olympic rings to admire”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  13. “BNE – The Event – Review”. Transmission Communications. Brisbane. 9 September 2014. Archived from the original on 12 January 2026. Retrieved 12 January 2026. ↩︎
  14. Remmer, Dennis (2014). BNE – The Definitive Archive: Brisbane Independent Electronic Music Production 1979–2014. Transmission Communications. ISBN 9780646921501. ↩︎
  15. “Megamen – Designed for Living”. Bandcamp. 1 December 2024. Archived from the original on 13 January 2026. Retrieved 13 January 2026. ↩︎
  16. Dennis, Patrick (2002). Little Me (2nd ed.). New York: Broadway Books. p. 268. ISBN 0-7679-1347-7. ↩︎
  17. Kelly, David Owen (2025). Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso. p. 71. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  18. Leopard, Lance (15 September 2000). “$1.5 million of Olympic rings to admire”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  19. Moore, Tony (18 June 2024). “New Romantic musician and staple of Brisbane’s ’80s club scene killed in fire”. Brisbane Times. Archived from the original on 8 January 2026. Retrieved 8 January 2026. ↩︎
  20. Frankham, Nic (27 July 1995). “Obituary Brenton Heath-Kerr”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  21. Johnston, Brad (1 October 1998). “The accidental artists”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  22. Frankham, Nic (27 July 1995). “Obituary Brenton Heath-Kerr”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  23. Canning, Paul (2 April 1993). “The Boundary Rider”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  24. “Folly of Gossip: a look into Sydney’s early drag scene”. The Guardian. 19 February 2023. Archived from the original on 11 February 2026. Retrieved 11 February 2026. ↩︎
  25. Hayes, Paul (10 December 1993). “Enchantress and refined sugar”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  26. Leopard, Lance (19 August 1994). “My way of life”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  27. Leopard, Lance (17 November 2000). “Take a bow”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  28. Mills, David (23 November 2000). “Everything must go. Satellite Group pubs and papers up for sale”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  29.  Leopard, Lance (19 September 1997). “Eyelash”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  30. Leopard, Lance (18 July 1996). “You’re glaring at me”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  31. MacNeill, Ian (23 February 1995). “Young Marilyn”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  32. Widdicombe, Ben; Magnusson, Tony (5 January 1996). “The Inaugural Media Matters Weasel Awards”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  33. O’Grady, Dom (24 June 2024). “Vale Lance Leopard”. Star Observer. Archived from the original on 4 January 2026. Retrieved 4 January 2026. ↩︎
  34. Leopard, Lance (13 February 1998). “Lance Leopard in freak accident!”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  35.  Leopard, Lance (9 January 1997). “There’s got to be a morning after”. Sydney Star Observer. Retrieved 12 January 2026. ↩︎
  36. Leopard, Lance (6 October 1995). “Lance Leopard’s best and worst of Sleaze”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  37. Leopard, Lance (20 February 1997). “Female on the beach”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  38. Leopard, Lance (6 August 1999). “Sleazeball of the Year”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  39.  Leopard, Lance (27 October 2000). “Mancini and me”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  40. Leopard, Lance (27 October 2000). “Mancini and me”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  41. O’Grady, Dom (24 June 2024). “Vale Lance Leopard”. Star Observer. Archived from the original on 4 January 2026. Retrieved 4 January 2026.Cahill, Phillippe (2 May 1996). “I told you so”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  42. Dennis, Patrick (2025). “A Star is Born”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso Books. p. 75. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  43. Dennis, Patrick (2025). “A Star is Born”. In Goodbun, Rod; Shaw, Edwina (eds.). Queersland. Brisbane: AndAlso Books. p. 75. ISBN 978-1-7641424-0-3. ↩︎
  44. Cahill, Phillippe (2 May 1996). “I told you so”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  45. Cahill, Phillippe (2 May 1996). “I told you so”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  46. “Love Machine’s last stand”. Sydney Star Observer. 17 June 1999. ↩︎
  47. Devine, Stephen (12 March 1999). “Devine Intervention”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  48. Leopard, Lance (27 June 1996). “The skyscrapers of Darlinghurst”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  49. “Trip that light fantastic”. Sydney Star Observer. 16 February 1996. ↩︎
  50. Widdicombe, Ben (13 February 1997). “A Fair to remember”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  51. “DIVA vote changes”. Sydney Star Observer. 13 July 1995. ↩︎
  52. “The Bobby Goldsmith Foundation”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 December 1999. ↩︎
  53. Leopard, Lance (12 February 1998). “The Queen of romance? Forget it!”. Capital Q. Sydney. ISSN 1444-0822. ↩︎
  54. “The Bobby Goldsmith Foundation”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 December 1999. ↩︎
  55. “Bobby Goldsmith Foundation would like to thank …”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 March 2000. ↩︎
  56. “The Bobby Goldsmith Foundation”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 December 1999. ↩︎
  57. “The AIDS Council of NSW would like to thank…”. Sydney Star Observer. 6 July 2000. ↩︎
  58. “The Bobby Goldsmith Foundation”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 December 1999. ↩︎
  59. Johnston, Brad (14 October 1999). “Millennium bee”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  60. “The Bobby Goldsmith Foundation”. Sydney Star Observer. 9 December 1999. ↩︎
  61. Leopard, Lance (16 August 2001). “A lesson from Lance”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  62. Leopard, Lance (7 February 2002). “With regret”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  63. Knox, David (21 April 2012). “25 years: Maintain the raaaaaaaage!”. TV Tonight. Archived from the original on 8 January 2026. Retrieved 8 January 2026. ↩︎
  64. Tunstall, B.J. (20 April 2000). “B-Grade Cheese”. Sydney Star Observer. ↩︎
  65. Phillips, J.R. (1 August 2024). “ShortFest Short Film Festival Sydney 2026”. Eterna Films. Archived from the original on 12 January 2026. Retrieved 12 January 2026. ↩︎
  66. Phillips, J.R. (1 August 2024). “ShortFest Short Film Festival Sydney 2026”. Eterna Films. Archived from the original on 12 January 2026. Retrieved 12 January 2026. ↩︎
  67.  Rogers, Destiny (18 June 2024). “Vale Lance Leopard, and Carmel”. QNews. Brisbane. Archived from the original on 4 January 2026. Retrieved 4 January 2026. ↩︎

Left: by Tony Spackman. Centre: unknown, CQ April 1995. Right: Tamara Tonite interviews Lance in Brisbane, July 1999.

Eurovision 2024 Georges River Council

Went to Georges River Council’s booked-out Eurovision party at 4am in Hurstville. Incredible spread — free meatballs, cinnamon scrolls and coffee/hot chocolates!

FABBA performed 4.15am and they hadn’t seen my giant ABBA flag before, which we all waved around.

Yol and Ricki had attended last year and they invited me and Louise.

When the famous Eurovision fanfare blared at 5am, the auditorium was packed.

Council gave out free Eurovision Bingo cards and voting score sheets ranking “Bop-ability”, “Gives all the feels”, “Outfits be snatched” and “Flawless performance”.

My fave song was Croatia’s Ri Tim Tagi Dim, described by a critic as “for cat lovers and anxiety sufferers” and written and performed by Baby Lasagna (who hates lasagna!). It was inspired by many young people leaving farms and heading to foreign cities for better jobs. Though excited, the protagonist has anxiety attacks over leaving home and will mostly miss his cat. “Rim tim tagi dim” is the name of a fictional home village folk dance — “heavy metal with doilies” SBS called it.

I also loved Finland’s hilarious “No Rules” where a guy runs around pretending to be nude and there were last-minute strategically-placed props protecting his modesty. At Council’s party, several guys had dressed in the No Rules t-shirts, wigs and hats, so fun.

I loved UK entry’s Olly Alexander starring role in the AIDs TV series It’s A Sin and his song Dizzy unfortunately got zero in the public vote (which seemed unbelievable, considering the Eurovision audience).

ABBA’s appearance was mostly lifted from their Voyage show. Then my fave song didn’t win (came second) and it was all feeling like when your fave team comes last.

Just then I got a phone call from an ABBA fan we’d met early this morning and he offered a lift back so I gladly accepted and was out of there for a big long recovery sleeeeeeep…

Listening party for Agnetha’s new A+ album

5 ABBA fans watching Bobby's Brother on TV.Watching Bobby’s Brother on TV

We met at Pastizzi’s for Maltese pastries and tiramisu, then went back to mine to listen to Agnetha’s latest A+ reimagined album, in the exact tracklisted order.

Had a discussion about whether Agnetha’s A+ album cover was shot in 2023 or 2013. David sought a ruling via ABBAtalk and turns out it’s 2023 so the next dins at Pastizzi’s is on him!

The poor love was already exhausted after him and Angus had spent all day, when not doing their Nina Pretty Ballerina office jobs, running around since the crack of dawn trying to track down Agnetha’s A+ CD at any record shop in town. NONE had it! They’d wanted to recreate the record-buying excitement of a new album release from back in the good old days. At least we’d all combined our postage costs to do one bulk order from Europe so that’ll arrive one day…

There’s a fave line we all love from Agnetha’s new single, Where Do We Go From Here: “I thought I carried a heart made of steel, But you cracked it open ’cause you broke the seal.” Tech expert Angus used all his AI know-how, involving 10,000 super computers, to ask it to create a picture of Agnetha “breaking the seal” so we could all enjoy this artistic concept in visual format. “The main problem is the hands don’t look very real,” he said, oblivious to the fact that the concept of an imaginary Agnet breaking a seal was so far out there. (NB: His custom t-shirt-making machine had run out of transfer paper but as soon as he gets more, we’ll all be able to place orders…)

Angus’s AI
interpretation of
“Agnetha breaking
the seal”.

We ate Swedish pickled mushroom-flavoured potato crisps, Kafferep biscuits, Dumle candy and Daim chocolate, from IKEA, after Angus visited to get a free KÖR car organiser, designed for mid-sized SUVs, and a $10 voucher. While renowned for his attention to detail, Louise helpfully pointed out: “You just have to buy a car now so you can use it.”

I haven’t mentioned anything about George so far, suffice to say he spent the evening straightening all my pictures on the walls, as they were “slightly crooked”.

Then we watched Bobby’s Brother’s enlightening interview with Agnetha’s friend and producer Jörgen Elofsson. Why did he strip the Stockholm Philharmonic Orchestra off the entire album and replace it with a modern-day equivalent of Moog Plays ABBA?

Our faves were Back on Your Radio and I Was A Flower, with the great accusatory line: “Now look what you have done,” which prompted discussion about ABBA songs that blame someone else for their misery. George recalled Happy Hawaii has the line: “Someone is waiting and I forget you,” so we replayed that amazing ABBA song.

Had a moment’s silence for UK Alex’s canine critic Zippy, who loves the whistling bit in Perfume In the Breeze. Sorry Zips, it’s gone!

Am not going to name who looked totally confused during the whole listening, and the other whose fave song had been transformed into “something you’d play while doing the ironing”.

Meanwhile, at the same time out in Trundle they were holding the annual ABBA Festival in the middle of nowhere, and for the first time were live-streaming! ABBA fan H was planning on doing some busking there, but the council application required $10million in liability insurance! I dared him to play anyway: “I want live footage of you being arrested for playing Mamma Mia illegally on the main drag during an ABBA Festival!” But he knew there was no way we’d be visiting him at Bathurst Correctional Centre, since we hadn’t even made it to Trundle (5.5 hours’ drive from Sydney).

ABBA Voyage week itinerary

Friday 19 May, Saturday 20 May, Sunday 20 May: arrive after 35-hr journey. Rest up. Play it by ear re: plans. Staying at Peckham, then Travelodge Stratford (High St, Stratford), 11 minutes’ walk from ABBA Arena.

Monday 23: 8.15am-3pm Harry Potter tour.
4pm: Visit ABBA fan friends who start arriving.
Dinner/drinks: available.

Tuesday 24: Rest day. Or do sights of London, hop on hop off bus tour with Roxanne etc.

Wednesday 25: 3.30pm: ABBA Arena for Aussie fans group photo.
7pm: British Library for Carl Magnus Palm talk.

Thursday 26: getting ready.
5pm: ABBA Arena.

Friday 27: 11am: photos at Waterloo Station – Rox’s event.
12pm: lunch/snacks/drinks at Oxo Tower overlooking the Thames River.
Arvo: pix on Thames on riverboat, ABBA-style?
2pm-5pm ABBATalk gathering: Print House, 133 High St.
5.30pm: Standing outside for ABBA Arena for Opening Night.
Back at Hotel: Launch of Obi-Wan Kenobi on Disney Plus!

Saturday 28: 9am: Brighton Beach for fans pic at Eurovision Dome. Guided ABBA tour and lunch.
7pm: ABBA Arena for Voyage.

Sunday 29: 12pm ABBA Fans picnic at Victoria Embankment Gardens.
6.30pm-10.30pm: Mamma Mia The Party – Unit 6.05, The, 02 Peninsula Square, London SE10 0DX

Monday 30: free. Chilling out.

Tuesday 31: Leave in morning for Heathrow and back to Oz!

(I’ll be checking my email, so you can contact me via this website Contact page. Or FB Messenger etc.)

ABBA pool party!

“Sue lies by the pool…”

Rain and thunderstorms were predicted for my ABBA Pool Party in the height of summer in Oz, but luckily we caught a break and it was warmly humid with a mild breeze. 21 degrees, nice!

In order of Arrival, there was me, Louise, Yol, George and David. We were going to get takeaway and eat it by the pool, but cos we’d been brought up in the 60s/70s to “never swim within an hour of eating” (years later disproven) we decided to follow that maxim – the theory back then was you’d get stomach cramps and DIE/drown! We’re still too terrified to go for a dip after having thought about eating even a crumb, so we put all our food in the fridge and headed off to the pool.

Got there, whipped our covid masks off and jumped in.

Had a splash around and after a while we lined up along the side of the deep end for a photo, with the ABBA towel on the edge and ABBA dolls sunbaking on it. All ready for our closeups, when suddenly WHOOSH!! EMMERGENCY!! A gust of wind and the ABBA dolls and towel were blown into the deep end of the pool and needed rescuing!

“Sue lies by the pool” had become “Sue in the pool!”

Worse, the chlorine had made all the colours in the doll clothes and ABBA towel run, threatening to stain the dolls! All irreplaceable! Luckily the dolls all knew how to swim and floated, so I leapt out of the pool and ran back upstairs to my flat, with Louise’s wise words ringing in my ears: “Use the Colour Catchers!!”

I used nearly a whole pack of Colour Catchers in the washing machine and they all came out bright red after the wash!!

I gave the ABBA dolls and their clothes a thorough cold rinse. Then back to my guests!!

We all rinsed off and had dinner outside on the balcony – George had thoughtfully bought us all Newtown’s famous Clem’s chicken and tabbouleh, and we finished off with Connoisseur chocolate icecreams in blood orange and hazelnut flavours. Divine!

By now, it was about 8pm, so it was time to finish up, as I’d just invited everyone for only a casual swim and dinner get together.

But David started rummaging around on this phone and lo and behold found several rare ABBA clips he just had to share. “Fire up the chromecast!” he ordered.

I turned on the telly, then remembered I had three 1-hour BBC specials my fabulous ex had sent me recently – The Joy of ABBA, ABBA at the BBC and Agnetha: ABBA and After. Well, there was no way anyone was leaving before all three had been fully watched and discussed at length! (We found it shocking that’s LOTS of rare Aussie footage was featured in all the UK specials and we NEVER get to see that footage here! It’s because the BBC has more $$$ for sorting out copyright issues.)

Eventually, after mentioning Bjorn’s latest podcast, our admiration for Bobby’s Brother’s analysis of ABBA songs on Youtube, and the recent rising view count of my Someone Else’s Story vid, it was time to say goodbyes: “Take a pic of the ABBA dolls drying on the clothes stand!” So I did. And here it is!