If You Are The One TV fest

Have held a couple of If You Are The One fests at mine. I’d watch a zillion episodes and edited them down savagely and we’d watch from 1pm to 7pm. So many heart-wrenching emotions!

About 7 guests turn up and we order tummy-filling Chinese food from Happy Chef.

I’d selected bits that reflected Chinese culture. So we got lots of zany stuff about not dating Westerners, choosing people on the basis of single or double eyelids, preferences for Asian women with fair skin (even to the point of the guy insisting the woman play sport at nighttime so she didn’t get a tan), comments on Westerners’ “three-dimensional” faces, their thoughts on the “one child policy” and the dating trials faced by female PhD students (any woman who studies too much finds it harder to get a date). Le Jia said Westerners would be arrested by making such racial distinctions, if saying that in America.

I like all their philosophical wisdom: Le Jia said to a young man: “You pay an unnecessary price for being too sharp.” Meng Fei: “When you get to a certain age, you’ll put on weight even if you drink water!” Everything Huang Han says is brilliant, especially about Aristotle: she’s very good at arguing the finer points with arrogant candidates.

Regarding the one-child policy, Le Jia and Meng Fei pointed out that couples didn’t need to have children, they could “devote their time to serving others and socialism”. Or they might want to “give love to children who don’t have parental love.” Huang Han says having a child shouldn’t be a filial duty, but should be done because the couple wants to have a child.

In Chinese society, it seems the most desirable traits are that women are pure and simple and men are sunny and carefree.

B made delicious coconut and lime cake, Ant brought Singapore orchids, Kris brought fortune cookies, and I provided Lychee tea, pork buns and shrimp and meat-flavoured crisps (recommended by Asian bloke at Asian supermarket).

I will be holding another IYATO fest for a special person who missed out, being overseas at the moment.



I hate it. It’s based on the traditional Aussie Vegemite but has to be kept in the fridge (unlike Vegemite, which is so full of salt it could last anywhere). Cheesybite is a mild caramel colour and lacks the saltiness and tang of Vegemite. Kraft says they made Cheesybite so you can spread it without butter. But I spread my Vegemite without butter anyway, as I usually have it on water crackers. I like it thick and plain. I prefer the biting flavour of Vegemite.

Also, Cheesybite has less vitamins, less salt and more fat.  It will always be chilled because you have to keep it in the fridge. And you have to eat it within four weeks, whereas Vegemite lasts forever. Fail!